Stuck in a regenerating tls certificate crashloop

A “challenged” team of engineers and product people decided it was a good idea to implement the tls certificate regeneration as wiping the whole screen and then showing the UI elements rather than something sane like, oh, I don’t know, a single notification? This is like that gif of like Karl Malone and Kobe Bryant trying to get up but one of their limbs keeps getting tangled up with the other one each time the other one gets up, so they keep falling down to the ground in a tangle about eight times over a full minute. Imagine that.